An empath's guide to navigating social media.

BY CHRISTINE VEZAROV

Christine is twenty-something coffee-and-vibes enthusiast who comes alive sitting across women, hearing their stories and journeying with them towards health and self-discovery. She firmly believes in the beauty of process, community and finding true belonging. When she’s not writing, engaging creativity or coaching women, you’ll probably find Christine geeking out over her plants or snuggled in a corner reading or listening to personal development podcasts. Connect with Christine over on her Instagram or website!

Have you ever sat down for two minutes to catch up on Instagram—and it turned into an hour of mindless scrolling on Reels…? Or maybe you are a frequent lurker, and the only engagement you initiate is a faithful swipe and flick through the Stories line-up on your home page?

Guilty? Me too.

I’ve also had to chuck my phone across the couch in the hopes that I stop feeling other people’s emotions through my screen. I’m an empath. You too?

Any time we engage in social media, there’s bound to be flecks of our humanity wrapped up in it. And this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it does require us to be mindful. 

I don’t know about you, but I can start swirling in unhealthy thought patterns if I don’t have boundaries with my relationship to social media. I notice this the most when:

1. I begin comparing my unglamourous life to others’ highlight reels.

2. I see the number of followers someone else has and feel a twinge of jealousy.

3. I spend copious amounts of time scrolling to avoid a real-life stressor.

That’s why I have guidelines about my online consumption, so I can engage well. They aren’t rigid, legalistic rules—they’re flexible, and firm (and I totally suggest you come up with your own too).

Here are my 3 guidelines to using social media as an empath: 

1. Set a time limit.

Choose to engage with intention—time is your only non-renewable resource.

“Digital wellness” is a thing, and I love that it has a name. See, social media apps are designed to suck you in and keep you there (it’s how they pull a profit). 

You don’t need to delete all your apps and swear off the algorithms, but I think there’s wisdom in being intentional, knowing what you need and understanding your limits, too.

1. Know the difference between vulnerability and transparency.

Authenticity is not showing up the same way, in every space. 

Here’s what I mean: I won’t divulge in a deeply traumatic experience with you the same way I would with my husband, my best friend and life partner. I wouldn’t process my emotions with a stranger the same way I do with my therapist.

Different people get different amounts of access to you—and that’s a healthy boundary line. Social media tends to blur these lines—so it’s up to you to define it and hold the line well.

My gut-check for any story, post or writing I share is this: have I already processed this and am sharing it to encourage someone with my hindsight—or am I emotion-vomiting in the heat of the moment and hoping to grab someone’s attention?

The heart of the matter, matters.

1. Show up to contribute, and then log off.

Say no to the end endless scroll. Yes, check in with your friends—I use this INCREDIBLE tool called the “mute” button on 90% of the people I follow so I intentionally need to check on them 😉.

Your voice matters. And when you lurk, you silence yourself into a mere metric. 

So, go and show up with intention: comment and cheer someone on. Reply to their story and tell them you are thinking of them. Post that encouraging word and your daily latte (guilty, aha). Get creative—and contribute.

And then log off. Put the phone down, and get back to creating, living, and being (this is why I started Peptalks With Purpose). 

Remember that real life is happening around you in this very moment. It’s not on pause. And we need you, fully you. Fully connected to who you are, and fully alive.

Being an empath is an incredible quality. It’s a superpower – use it well and for the good of others.